Can I just say I hate today??? Today must be an emotional detox day for me or something. I am irritable and sad. S is making something that smells yummy. He said he was going to make dumplings earlier. I love dumplings. I actually did cry a bit. I am hating life. I feel so deprived and left out. I hate that. And I am totally doing it to myself, so WTF!! I am also freezing. We got some Epsom Salts and I am trying to convince myself that I should get up and clean the tub and take a bath and I will feel a bunch better, but I am so cold I am having a hard time convincing myself. Part of me just wants to go to bed for the rest of the weekend and sleep, but I don't want to leave S all by himself. It would be selfish because he wants to spend time with me even if I am feeling like a total bitch.
Ugh, I am so sick of this!!! I hate detox days, I really do. Sure, I am a big freakin' baby.
28.2.09
Day Six (In Which Veronica Gets to Sleep)
My apologies for not posting last night. I was simply too tired when I got home. I made some lemonade and proceeded to be a total lump on the couch. S made himself a deconstructed sushi dinner which looked amazing. He had sushi rice in a bowl with some Wakami Furikake (dried seaweed rice seasoning) on top with some avocado and sushi grade tuna on the side. It looked so good and I was so tired, I just wanted to cry. I was strong however, and stuck with my lemonade.
S was sweet enough to make the bed while I had my smooth move tea which I had steeped for a couple of extra minutes. As soon as I was done drinking it I crawled in bed and was asleep before 10. S's phone rang at 11:30 and woke me up, but I had to go pee anyway so it was okay. When I got back into bed I had some fairly bad cramps from the tea, but managed to fall back to sleep pretty quickly.
This morning all my suspicions about yesterday being a detox day were confirmed. The tea did it's work and when I did my SWF at 7:30 this morning I had some very good results. I went back to bed after that and proceeded to sleep like a dead thing with only a couple of bathroom visits until 10:30. Then we got up and I started drinking my lemonade. I have grand designs that I will clean the bedroom and a bunch of other stuff, but I am still tired. I feel like I could go back to sleep, but I know that I must just be detoxing, so I am going to listen to what my body needs and try to keep it low key today. I have reading and stuff to do, so I am all bundled up on the couch under a blanket next to S who is being crafty with a coat and metal bits. Mmm, lazy Saturday.
S was sweet enough to make the bed while I had my smooth move tea which I had steeped for a couple of extra minutes. As soon as I was done drinking it I crawled in bed and was asleep before 10. S's phone rang at 11:30 and woke me up, but I had to go pee anyway so it was okay. When I got back into bed I had some fairly bad cramps from the tea, but managed to fall back to sleep pretty quickly.
This morning all my suspicions about yesterday being a detox day were confirmed. The tea did it's work and when I did my SWF at 7:30 this morning I had some very good results. I went back to bed after that and proceeded to sleep like a dead thing with only a couple of bathroom visits until 10:30. Then we got up and I started drinking my lemonade. I have grand designs that I will clean the bedroom and a bunch of other stuff, but I am still tired. I feel like I could go back to sleep, but I know that I must just be detoxing, so I am going to listen to what my body needs and try to keep it low key today. I have reading and stuff to do, so I am all bundled up on the couch under a blanket next to S who is being crafty with a coat and metal bits. Mmm, lazy Saturday.
27.2.09
Day 5 - The Ongoing Saga
The tiredness has not let up. All I want to do is sit on the couch under a blanket. The cravings keep coming and going so apparently Day 5 is a big detox day for me. I seem to be having tiny bursts where I feel great and have resolve, but for the most part today I have just wanted food. I know it's not an option. I do not want to let myself down, but I hate hate hate the feeling of being deprived of food. I know it is only psychological, but it certainly sucks.
I am going to skip yoga tonight and just go home make the bed and then get comfy clothes on. Make some lemonade and curl up on the couch. I think that is all I am up for today.
Today has had a lot of introspection as well as the other detox symptoms. I think I need to work on forgiving myself for things that have happened in the past. I also don't miss drinking alcohol at all. I am looking forward to experiencing the club and parties and things without it. That is very strange for me, but very important as well. I don't miss anything other than eating. I have never felt like that before. Times, they are a-changing!
I am going to skip yoga tonight and just go home make the bed and then get comfy clothes on. Make some lemonade and curl up on the couch. I think that is all I am up for today.
Today has had a lot of introspection as well as the other detox symptoms. I think I need to work on forgiving myself for things that have happened in the past. I also don't miss drinking alcohol at all. I am looking forward to experiencing the club and parties and things without it. That is very strange for me, but very important as well. I don't miss anything other than eating. I have never felt like that before. Times, they are a-changing!
Day Five (In Which Veronica is Dragging)
I promise I will stop with the (un)catchy bylines as soon as this cleanse is over. I'll have better post titles. Really. I will.
I slept pretty well last night until I woke up at 5:00 to go pee. I dozed until S's alarm went off and then downed my SWF at 6:16. Dozed again until about 6:40 then had to go. Thought I was doing fine so went back to doze until 7. Well apparently that was not in the cards, because as soon as I dozed off I had a little accident. I mean VERY small, but enough to make me levitate out of the bed and to the bathroom. Argh, that hasn't happened before. Oh well, it was really no big deal to clean up. Guess I need to be more careful with the SWF in the future. Now we will have clean sheets, LOL.
I managed to keep up with my dry skin brushing (DSB) and my Neti Pot this morning. I wonder if the DSB is kicking my detox up a notch? Because I am very glad it's Friday as I am beat today. I am just dragging. I could go back to sleep right now with no problem at all. I am very ready for the weekend to let my body detox in peace and comfort. I am excited to just relax before school starts as well because this is probably my last weekend to relax the whole time. Next weekend is the party at the Phatty house and the weekend after that is XMortis Apocalypse. Then classes start. Whew.
I have some stuff that I need to do like organize my bookshelves and perhaps put some clothes away that don't fit me right now. Oh, and I need to finish S and my filing before school starts for sure as I do not want to have to deal with disorganisation while studying. That will drive me crazy. At least the taxes are done.
I have been craving food all morning. I really want a good Everything bagel, toasted, with Smoked Salmon cream cheese. Or anything right now really. I think it's because I am tired. I want to go take a nap, but alas, that is not in the cards. Oh well. Maybe later. Oh I am so looking forward to curling up under a blanket and reading or knitting or colouring. Yes I said colouring. I still love to colour and probably always will.
I slept pretty well last night until I woke up at 5:00 to go pee. I dozed until S's alarm went off and then downed my SWF at 6:16. Dozed again until about 6:40 then had to go. Thought I was doing fine so went back to doze until 7. Well apparently that was not in the cards, because as soon as I dozed off I had a little accident. I mean VERY small, but enough to make me levitate out of the bed and to the bathroom. Argh, that hasn't happened before. Oh well, it was really no big deal to clean up. Guess I need to be more careful with the SWF in the future. Now we will have clean sheets, LOL.
I managed to keep up with my dry skin brushing (DSB) and my Neti Pot this morning. I wonder if the DSB is kicking my detox up a notch? Because I am very glad it's Friday as I am beat today. I am just dragging. I could go back to sleep right now with no problem at all. I am very ready for the weekend to let my body detox in peace and comfort. I am excited to just relax before school starts as well because this is probably my last weekend to relax the whole time. Next weekend is the party at the Phatty house and the weekend after that is XMortis Apocalypse. Then classes start. Whew.
I have some stuff that I need to do like organize my bookshelves and perhaps put some clothes away that don't fit me right now. Oh, and I need to finish S and my filing before school starts for sure as I do not want to have to deal with disorganisation while studying. That will drive me crazy. At least the taxes are done.
I have been craving food all morning. I really want a good Everything bagel, toasted, with Smoked Salmon cream cheese. Or anything right now really. I think it's because I am tired. I want to go take a nap, but alas, that is not in the cards. Oh well. Maybe later. Oh I am so looking forward to curling up under a blanket and reading or knitting or colouring. Yes I said colouring. I still love to colour and probably always will.
26.2.09
Day 4 - Sleepy girl!!
I called my dad on the walk home for work. He actually reads my blog!! Woot. He is very excited that I am going back to school to complete what I started and I am too. I sent in the rest of my paper work and first payment and filled out my military scholarship application. Hopefully in a week or two I will have all my materials for my first class!!
When I got home I was spacey but good. Had a really good yoga session with a lot of hip openers and it felt great. Steven made some sort of steak stir-fry goulash thing that smelled fabulous, but unlike yesterday I just enjoyed smelling it. I really didn't want it. Yes, it would have been nice to eat, but I seem to be able to overcome my moments of weakness faster today. Hopefully tomorrow will be even easier.
Made my normal lemonade after yoga and had a glass after. I am now just sitting having my Smooth Move tea. Soon to bed for one of S's patented amazing backrubs!!
When I got home I was spacey but good. Had a really good yoga session with a lot of hip openers and it felt great. Steven made some sort of steak stir-fry goulash thing that smelled fabulous, but unlike yesterday I just enjoyed smelling it. I really didn't want it. Yes, it would have been nice to eat, but I seem to be able to overcome my moments of weakness faster today. Hopefully tomorrow will be even easier.
Made my normal lemonade after yoga and had a glass after. I am now just sitting having my Smooth Move tea. Soon to bed for one of S's patented amazing backrubs!!
Day 4 - Continued
It was free lunch day here at the office. I knew it was going to be. Every Thursday is. I thought I would be okay because it was Papa Gino's which is gross as we all know. It smelled so good though. So good. I didn't have any of course. I am not going to let myself down on day 4. or any of the days for that matter. It is very important that I do this. I have tried it 2 other times and stopped early. Someone on one of the Master Cleanse boards wrote something along the lines of:
"If you quit doing something you've challenged your self to do it creates a groove in your brain and you are more likely to quit other challenges. If you push yourself through and succeed with the challenge, that makes a whole new groove and then you are more likely to succeed."
I probably botched the quote horribly, but that's the gist of it. I like the idea of that. There are so many things in my life that I had set out to do and then quit. I don't like that about myself at all. This cleanse is a way for me to make a new groove. Goddess knows I need it.
At lunch today I opted out of the neighborhood walk as I was so beat last night and I think that was why. Instead I talked to S on the phone for a bit while standing in the relatively warm hall way. We got into a tiff about snack food of all things. I guess talking about food is a bad thing during the cleanse? Maybe not. It turns out S was afraid I was going to go Vegan again. I am not. I am not even going to go pescetarian like I mentioned earlier. I just want to know where my food is coming from. I also want to eat healthy and homemade. I like too many different types of food and it all means too much to me for me to limit myself again. Especially with S and I both cooking so well and so often. I really wish it was next week. Really!
"If you quit doing something you've challenged your self to do it creates a groove in your brain and you are more likely to quit other challenges. If you push yourself through and succeed with the challenge, that makes a whole new groove and then you are more likely to succeed."
I probably botched the quote horribly, but that's the gist of it. I like the idea of that. There are so many things in my life that I had set out to do and then quit. I don't like that about myself at all. This cleanse is a way for me to make a new groove. Goddess knows I need it.
At lunch today I opted out of the neighborhood walk as I was so beat last night and I think that was why. Instead I talked to S on the phone for a bit while standing in the relatively warm hall way. We got into a tiff about snack food of all things. I guess talking about food is a bad thing during the cleanse? Maybe not. It turns out S was afraid I was going to go Vegan again. I am not. I am not even going to go pescetarian like I mentioned earlier. I just want to know where my food is coming from. I also want to eat healthy and homemade. I like too many different types of food and it all means too much to me for me to limit myself again. Especially with S and I both cooking so well and so often. I really wish it was next week. Really!
Day Four (In Which Veronica Wears More Clothes)
I slept pretty well last night. I woke up at 5:43 after having a very weird dream about Madonna and I going out clubbing and trashing my grandparent's house when we got back. Apparently we were house sitting in my grandparent's old house in Sherborn. In the dream I was devastated that I had gone out drinking and that I had trashed the house. More that I had gone out drinking though. There was also some sort of strange creature in the basement that I thought was a monster, but it turned out to be friendly. Very strange.
After I woke up I tried to snuggle back to sleep but had to go to the bathroom. When I came back I tried to sleep more but S's alarm went off. So I downed my SWF and cuddled some more. Surprisingly I was awake when S left for work, but I conked right out after that. I didn't wake up until my 7:00 alarm went off, and that was after having gone to bed at 10:00. It was a good thing I got up when I did as the SWF wasn't waiting anymore. I got up and dealt with that, then did my dry brushing and took a lovely shower. After that, I slathered myself with coconut oil as I am wont to do and my skin feels LOVELY!! Now I just need to add my Neti Pot to my routines in the morning and before yoga and I will be fabulous!!
Speaking of Neti Pots, I need to address something here. I had a good sense of smell before I quit smoking. A really good sense of smell. It wasn't as disturbing as my father's but it was up there. I have been smoke free for 11 days now and my sense of smell has increased. Now add this cleanse in and I can smell for miles. Seriously. It's insane. Unfortunately there are some really bad smells in our apartment that I have to encounter and this morning was no different. Ugh. On the plus side I cannot wait to see how food tastes after all this is over!
I have a lot more clothes on today to try and stay warm. Well not a lot more, but hopefully enough. I have tights on under my pants and a camisole under my sweaters. It seems a bit better, but my hands are cold. And I miss food. I really really miss food. It's amazing how often I use it to break up the day. I am stunned how much I miss looking forward to it and smelling it and tasting it. I love that food is such a big part of my life, but I had stopped differentiating between good food and bad food. One of the reasons I am doing this cleanse is to get back to the good food. The healing healthy food. I don't want to be super strict with my diet, but I would like the food that I enjoy to be wholesome and minimally processed. And local when possible. I want to make everything I can from scratch so I know what's in it. Hmm, I miss cooking too.
Erg, 6 days left.
After I woke up I tried to snuggle back to sleep but had to go to the bathroom. When I came back I tried to sleep more but S's alarm went off. So I downed my SWF and cuddled some more. Surprisingly I was awake when S left for work, but I conked right out after that. I didn't wake up until my 7:00 alarm went off, and that was after having gone to bed at 10:00. It was a good thing I got up when I did as the SWF wasn't waiting anymore. I got up and dealt with that, then did my dry brushing and took a lovely shower. After that, I slathered myself with coconut oil as I am wont to do and my skin feels LOVELY!! Now I just need to add my Neti Pot to my routines in the morning and before yoga and I will be fabulous!!
Speaking of Neti Pots, I need to address something here. I had a good sense of smell before I quit smoking. A really good sense of smell. It wasn't as disturbing as my father's but it was up there. I have been smoke free for 11 days now and my sense of smell has increased. Now add this cleanse in and I can smell for miles. Seriously. It's insane. Unfortunately there are some really bad smells in our apartment that I have to encounter and this morning was no different. Ugh. On the plus side I cannot wait to see how food tastes after all this is over!
I have a lot more clothes on today to try and stay warm. Well not a lot more, but hopefully enough. I have tights on under my pants and a camisole under my sweaters. It seems a bit better, but my hands are cold. And I miss food. I really really miss food. It's amazing how often I use it to break up the day. I am stunned how much I miss looking forward to it and smelling it and tasting it. I love that food is such a big part of my life, but I had stopped differentiating between good food and bad food. One of the reasons I am doing this cleanse is to get back to the good food. The healing healthy food. I don't want to be super strict with my diet, but I would like the food that I enjoy to be wholesome and minimally processed. And local when possible. I want to make everything I can from scratch so I know what's in it. Hmm, I miss cooking too.
Erg, 6 days left.
25.2.09
Day 3 - The Final Post
I got home and snuggled with S to further my attempt to get warm. It worked for a bit. Then I made myself do yoga. I was tired, but I persevered. Even in light of the fact that S made a very VERY yummy smelling eggplant lasagna. He used eggplant slices in place of noodles. It looked and smelled FABULOUS even though he said it tasted like crap. Yeah, right. I think he was sparing my feelings.
I called school after yoga to get the final word on payments and things, and that will all be taken care of on Friday. I was/am tired. I had to drag myself into the kitchen to make my juice. Luckily, S came with me to keep me from hurting myself on the juicer. I decided to use limes for tomorrows drinks and he made some crack about lime-aid and ADD or something that made me laugh WAAAAAY more than was warranted. So much so that he started looking at me funny. I suppose that was an emotional detox moment. Either that or I am going crazy.
Now I sit and finish my Smooth Move Tea and then off to get ready for bed and snuggles and sleep!
I called school after yoga to get the final word on payments and things, and that will all be taken care of on Friday. I was/am tired. I had to drag myself into the kitchen to make my juice. Luckily, S came with me to keep me from hurting myself on the juicer. I decided to use limes for tomorrows drinks and he made some crack about lime-aid and ADD or something that made me laugh WAAAAAY more than was warranted. So much so that he started looking at me funny. I suppose that was an emotional detox moment. Either that or I am going crazy.
Now I sit and finish my Smooth Move Tea and then off to get ready for bed and snuggles and sleep!
Day 3 Continued
So I went for a walk around the neighborhood while I talked to S for my lunch break. It was an effort to get warmer and I think it worked for the most part. At least when I got back I was warmer and I haven't gotten really chilled that badly since I have been back. I was a bit hungry and had a slight headache when I got back, but had some water and lemonade and felt better. I am glad I got out and got some exercise! I needed it badly.
I cannot wait to do yoga tonight. My muscles are really tight. Especially my hips and my shoulders. I skipped yoga yesterday to call school and cuddle with S and Monday I taught which means no real yoga for me. Sunday I took off because I was trying to eat myself out of house and home, tee hee. Ugh, I haven't done yoga since Saturday. Must . . . do . . . asanas!!
I think I am having some detox symptoms today. I keep having memory smells. It's as if I think I am almost smelling a food. Sometimes pasta boiling, sometimes others. I don't really smell them and I am not having an olfactory hallucination. It's more like my nose is craving food scents if that's possible. It's strange. I was also hungry today for a little bit, but I think that's from taking a walk. If you exercise you have to up the lemonade. The other thing is I want to cook food. Anything. I keep running through lists of all the things I want to make. Strangely enough they are all mostly vegan which is good. I really want meat to become something occasional again. Except for maybe fish. I love fish. But I guess there is nothing wrong with being mostly pescetarian again.
I cannot wait to do yoga tonight. My muscles are really tight. Especially my hips and my shoulders. I skipped yoga yesterday to call school and cuddle with S and Monday I taught which means no real yoga for me. Sunday I took off because I was trying to eat myself out of house and home, tee hee. Ugh, I haven't done yoga since Saturday. Must . . . do . . . asanas!!
I think I am having some detox symptoms today. I keep having memory smells. It's as if I think I am almost smelling a food. Sometimes pasta boiling, sometimes others. I don't really smell them and I am not having an olfactory hallucination. It's more like my nose is craving food scents if that's possible. It's strange. I was also hungry today for a little bit, but I think that's from taking a walk. If you exercise you have to up the lemonade. The other thing is I want to cook food. Anything. I keep running through lists of all the things I want to make. Strangely enough they are all mostly vegan which is good. I really want meat to become something occasional again. Except for maybe fish. I love fish. But I guess there is nothing wrong with being mostly pescetarian again.
Day Three (In Which Veronica Posts When She Feels Like It)
Last night I slept pretty well except for around 4:30 when I woke up to go pee. I couldn't really fall back to sleep and so I have been a little tired this morning. The Smooth Tea made me cramp pretty badly, so I think that might have played a part in my having a hard time falling back to sleep. The SWF was consumed at 6:16 and I had to go at 6:40 so that's pretty quick. Very yellow BMs this morning, which according to discussion is from bile. I had some solid in the first one but the remaining were watery, which is to be expected.
Still super cold this morning. But I did manage to do the dry skin brushing before my shower. I turned on the shower and did the brushing in the bathroom because it was at least a bit warmer in there. The shower felt amazing this morning, so nice and warm. I walked really fast to work and got here slightly earlier than usual. I was warm when I got here for about 10 minutes and then got chilled again. I heated up a cup of water and just wrapped my hands around it for a bit which helped a lot. I am contemplating a brisk walk on my lunch break to try and get the blood flowing, but it is COLD out there.
meh
When I weighed myself this morning I was at 136.6 yay 1.6 lbs gone. LOL. It's probably water!
Still super cold this morning. But I did manage to do the dry skin brushing before my shower. I turned on the shower and did the brushing in the bathroom because it was at least a bit warmer in there. The shower felt amazing this morning, so nice and warm. I walked really fast to work and got here slightly earlier than usual. I was warm when I got here for about 10 minutes and then got chilled again. I heated up a cup of water and just wrapped my hands around it for a bit which helped a lot. I am contemplating a brisk walk on my lunch break to try and get the blood flowing, but it is COLD out there.
meh
When I weighed myself this morning I was at 136.6 yay 1.6 lbs gone. LOL. It's probably water!
24.2.09
Day Two (In Which Veronica is Cold)
So being the smart girl that I am, I brought today's SWF to bed with me last night. I only got up once and that was just to go pee. I slept the night away and then woke up when S's alarm went off the second time at 6:09 and did my SWF and then cuddled a bit before he had to get up and go to work. I decided to go use the restroom around 6:40 and the SWF was definitely more productive today. Some slightly solid BMs but a good deal of liquid too. So the cleansing starts in earnest.
I then went back to bed and wrote in my analog journal (I know, how archaic) for a bit and listened to a pod cast of two yoga teachers that I find really interesting and soothing. They are pretty entertaining in a yoga sorta way. Check them out here: http://www.mudramoments.com/. Then around 7:30 I got up to shower and such. I really want to add dry skin brushing to my morning routine, but I was too cold this morning. More eliminations of the primarily watery kinda and they stunk to high heaven. Egads I must have some toxic sludge up in there, LOL.
Packed up and headed to work and it was a cold cold walk. I just couldn't get warm even after I got to the office. I finally had a cup of mint tea around 3:00 to try and get a little warm but that only lasted a bit. A goodly amount of eliminations during the day. I got a little bored at one point but started reading online and distracted myself.
When I got home it was time to call my school. A little bit of background: I had been enrolled at the Australasian College of Health Sciences about a year and a half ago to get my diploma in Holistic Healthcare. Then some things happened in my life that I had to deal with and I had to drop out after only completing my certificate in Natural bodycare and herbalism; a very basic course. Basically I finished one course of the whole program and then dropped out. I am not proud of that. At all. But I also can't change it. There was simply too much crap in my life at that point and I wasn't in school for myself. I'm not sure what I was doing there. Things are much much different now. I am thrilled to be going back. I spoke to my admissions advisor and completed my interview and registration and should be starting class on March 16th.
I have to bone up on the material in the last course I took again, however, because I have to take proving exams for that course. That shouldn't be a big deal though and will kick start me back into school-mode.
I am still really cold. After I got off the phone with the school, S and I went and cuddled in our room under the blankets so I could perhaps warm up. It worked for a little bit, but alas I got cold again. Tonight was game night for S and the roommate and their friends, so around 8:30 everyone showed up and I went to go make my juice and clean the kitchen.
Now I am having my Smooth Move tea and am looking forward to curling up in bed with a book and dozing off. I am glad I use the Oil Cleansing Method (OCM) on my face because it involves super-hot water which might warm me back up.
I am super psyched about school because once I get my diploma and complete my yoga teacher training I can be a consultant and finally be doing what I want with my life. But for now, I will enjoy the journey to that point. Big sigh of relief all around.
I then went back to bed and wrote in my analog journal (I know, how archaic) for a bit and listened to a pod cast of two yoga teachers that I find really interesting and soothing. They are pretty entertaining in a yoga sorta way. Check them out here: http://www.mudramoments.com/. Then around 7:30 I got up to shower and such. I really want to add dry skin brushing to my morning routine, but I was too cold this morning. More eliminations of the primarily watery kinda and they stunk to high heaven. Egads I must have some toxic sludge up in there, LOL.
Packed up and headed to work and it was a cold cold walk. I just couldn't get warm even after I got to the office. I finally had a cup of mint tea around 3:00 to try and get a little warm but that only lasted a bit. A goodly amount of eliminations during the day. I got a little bored at one point but started reading online and distracted myself.
When I got home it was time to call my school. A little bit of background: I had been enrolled at the Australasian College of Health Sciences about a year and a half ago to get my diploma in Holistic Healthcare. Then some things happened in my life that I had to deal with and I had to drop out after only completing my certificate in Natural bodycare and herbalism; a very basic course. Basically I finished one course of the whole program and then dropped out. I am not proud of that. At all. But I also can't change it. There was simply too much crap in my life at that point and I wasn't in school for myself. I'm not sure what I was doing there. Things are much much different now. I am thrilled to be going back. I spoke to my admissions advisor and completed my interview and registration and should be starting class on March 16th.
I have to bone up on the material in the last course I took again, however, because I have to take proving exams for that course. That shouldn't be a big deal though and will kick start me back into school-mode.
I am still really cold. After I got off the phone with the school, S and I went and cuddled in our room under the blankets so I could perhaps warm up. It worked for a little bit, but alas I got cold again. Tonight was game night for S and the roommate and their friends, so around 8:30 everyone showed up and I went to go make my juice and clean the kitchen.
Now I am having my Smooth Move tea and am looking forward to curling up in bed with a book and dozing off. I am glad I use the Oil Cleansing Method (OCM) on my face because it involves super-hot water which might warm me back up.
I am super psyched about school because once I get my diploma and complete my yoga teacher training I can be a consultant and finally be doing what I want with my life. But for now, I will enjoy the journey to that point. Big sigh of relief all around.
23.2.09
Day One (In Which Veronica is Tired)
WARNING: THERE WILL BE TALK OF A SENSITIVE NATURE IN THIS BLOG SO IF YOU SQUICK EASILY IN THE FACE OF HUMAN BODILY FUNCTIONS READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!
Ok so I really didn't sleep much last night at all. I woke up at 3:30 and that was it. I was up. No real reason why. I wasn't anxious or anything, I was just awake. Tired, but awake. I realized that I needed to plan my Salt Water Flush (SWF) better. I realized that I should have made it the night before in a bottle and brought it into bed with me. I figured I should do it right then, so I got up at 3:30 went to the bathroom (which I think is what woke me up in the first place) and then made the SWF. I crawled back into bed and tried to sleep but that didn't really happen too much.
When S's alarm clock went off at 6:18 (third snooze attempt) I drank my SWF. I tried to doze off after he left for work and managed it a little too well. I finally dragged my carcass out of bed around 7:20. I started the shower and sat on the toilet hoping for an elimination. Had a little one, but not nearly what a SWF should produce. I wasn't that surprised however, as I am sure I am packed with nasty because I have been eating absolute CRAP (no pun intended) for the last couple months as my weight will attest to. I weighed myself this morning before the shower and, ack 138.2 lbs. I have put on nearly 15 pounds since christmas. I am not doing this cleanse to purely lose weight, although I will. I would be happy to be at 130, but we will see where we get to.
I took a shower and packed up my lemonade and walked to work. The work day went by fairly quickly and uneventfully. I drank my lemonade and water like a good girl. Had a few eliminations throughout the day. Tomorrow will bring the ones that go with the SWF I am sure. Who would have ever thought I would be looking forward to having watery BMs??? But that's how you know you are starting to detox!!
S walked part of the way up to meet me on my way home from work and we basically ran teh rest of the way back to the house because it was freezing out and very windy. We snuggled for a bit on the couch and then I had to get ready for M's first yoga lesson. She came over at 6:30 and we went for about an hour. I think she did amazingly well for her first time ever. I think she is going to become a regular student which is exciting, even if I am not certified yet and I am basically just helping out a friend. After yoga was over S came upstairs and we sat and had tea and M got to have some of my yummy homemade bread with Nutella. I had some mint tea which is the only other thing besides laxitive tea, SWF, and the lemonade that is allowed on this cleanse. It was very warming which I needed as i don't get as warm when I am teaching as I do when I am actually doing yoga.
So now M has just left, it's about 8:30 and I have just enough energy left to make up my lemonade for tomorrow, drink my Smooth Move tea, and collapse into bed with S to hopefully get some sleep tonight!!
Ok so I really didn't sleep much last night at all. I woke up at 3:30 and that was it. I was up. No real reason why. I wasn't anxious or anything, I was just awake. Tired, but awake. I realized that I needed to plan my Salt Water Flush (SWF) better. I realized that I should have made it the night before in a bottle and brought it into bed with me. I figured I should do it right then, so I got up at 3:30 went to the bathroom (which I think is what woke me up in the first place) and then made the SWF. I crawled back into bed and tried to sleep but that didn't really happen too much.
When S's alarm clock went off at 6:18 (third snooze attempt) I drank my SWF. I tried to doze off after he left for work and managed it a little too well. I finally dragged my carcass out of bed around 7:20. I started the shower and sat on the toilet hoping for an elimination. Had a little one, but not nearly what a SWF should produce. I wasn't that surprised however, as I am sure I am packed with nasty because I have been eating absolute CRAP (no pun intended) for the last couple months as my weight will attest to. I weighed myself this morning before the shower and, ack 138.2 lbs. I have put on nearly 15 pounds since christmas. I am not doing this cleanse to purely lose weight, although I will. I would be happy to be at 130, but we will see where we get to.
I took a shower and packed up my lemonade and walked to work. The work day went by fairly quickly and uneventfully. I drank my lemonade and water like a good girl. Had a few eliminations throughout the day. Tomorrow will bring the ones that go with the SWF I am sure. Who would have ever thought I would be looking forward to having watery BMs??? But that's how you know you are starting to detox!!
S walked part of the way up to meet me on my way home from work and we basically ran teh rest of the way back to the house because it was freezing out and very windy. We snuggled for a bit on the couch and then I had to get ready for M's first yoga lesson. She came over at 6:30 and we went for about an hour. I think she did amazingly well for her first time ever. I think she is going to become a regular student which is exciting, even if I am not certified yet and I am basically just helping out a friend. After yoga was over S came upstairs and we sat and had tea and M got to have some of my yummy homemade bread with Nutella. I had some mint tea which is the only other thing besides laxitive tea, SWF, and the lemonade that is allowed on this cleanse. It was very warming which I needed as i don't get as warm when I am teaching as I do when I am actually doing yoga.
So now M has just left, it's about 8:30 and I have just enough energy left to make up my lemonade for tomorrow, drink my Smooth Move tea, and collapse into bed with S to hopefully get some sleep tonight!!
22.2.09
Changes . . .For the Better
For years and years I have been trying to figure out how to be happy. How to be the person that I am and want to be. For years and years I have failed to do that. I would quit smoking and drinking and eating poorly only to start again. Mostly because I was quitting out of either spite for someone I was with, or to distance myself from them. I have never actually moved towards health for myself. I have never actually done it because I wanted to or because it was right for me. I did it just because I thought I was supposed to and alack and alas it never worked.
This time is different. It's different all around. For the first time I am actually doing all these things for myself. I quit smoking and drinking for myself. I have the most amazing supportive man in the universe by my side. I finally have a drive in life. I want to help others be healthy naturally. I want to teach yoga. I am going back to school to get my Diploma in Holistic Health and I am also going to get certified to teach yoga.
First off, however, I need to push the giant reset button on my body. After drinking and smoking for so long and eating crap for the last few months, I am full of nasty evil toxins. So to get rid off all that and give my body/mind/spirit a clean slate, I am going to do the Master Cleanse for at least the recommended 10 days. I am starting this tomorrow. Well technically it starts tonight.
So knowing full well that I would not be eating anything for at least the next 10 days, I decided that I would eat "last meals" today. S and I went to the diner and I had Irish Benedict - Poached eggs and hollandaise on top of corned beef hash and english muffins with a side of hash browns and 2 cups of coffee with sugar and cream. Ugh - I was Ms. Bloatus Fatimus. Luckily I only ate about 1.5 of the benedicts and just about a quarter of the potatoes.
We then went to visit S's grandmother in the rehab facility she is in after injuring her leg. She was doing well. Apparantly we were too close to a really fancy grocery store though and S couldn't resist going there to get some things. So I may have slipped a box of Cheddar Scallion Cheese Sticks into the cart to eat on the ride home. I might have also snuck in a couple of Vermont Maple Honey Caramel chocolates for us as well. S got fixens for a tasty 'last supper' of sorts for us. He isn't doing this cleanse with me, but he is going to a diet of non-processed foods heavy in fruits and veggies, which is what I will be doing after I break fast. We also got a bunch of lemons for my cleanse.
It occurs to me that I ought to take a second to explain what this cleanse is all about. It was developed by Stanley Burroughs about 50 years ago as a way to conquer disease and help people get back to health. It consists of drinking a laxative tea each night, drinking what's called a salt water flush (2 tsp. of sea salt in 32 oz. of H2O to be the same specific gravity as the blood) every morning, and drinking 6-12 servings of lemonade throughout the day. Each serving of lemonade is made up of 2 Tbs. fresh-squeezed lemon juice, 2Tbs. grade B maple syrup, 1/10 tsp. cayenne pepper, and 8 oz. of water. To learn more you can google Master Cleanse or go to http://www.therawfoodsite.com/.
Back to the bad food . . . so we polished off the entire box of cheese sticks! OMG - YUM. S decided to make stir fried ginger steak with smoked gouda mashed potatoes and steamed greens. There was so much yummy food. He used a little over half the block of smoked gouda for the potatoes and we devoured the remaining cheese while he cooked. And then we ate. It was soooooo good. But I felt disgustingly fat afterwards. This cleanse cannot come at a better time.
I spent some time making up my lemonade for tomorrow. I made up a whole batch for work to make my life easier. So that's done. Now to drink my Smooth Move tea, relax with S, and go to bed. More tomorrow!
This time is different. It's different all around. For the first time I am actually doing all these things for myself. I quit smoking and drinking for myself. I have the most amazing supportive man in the universe by my side. I finally have a drive in life. I want to help others be healthy naturally. I want to teach yoga. I am going back to school to get my Diploma in Holistic Health and I am also going to get certified to teach yoga.
First off, however, I need to push the giant reset button on my body. After drinking and smoking for so long and eating crap for the last few months, I am full of nasty evil toxins. So to get rid off all that and give my body/mind/spirit a clean slate, I am going to do the Master Cleanse for at least the recommended 10 days. I am starting this tomorrow. Well technically it starts tonight.
So knowing full well that I would not be eating anything for at least the next 10 days, I decided that I would eat "last meals" today. S and I went to the diner and I had Irish Benedict - Poached eggs and hollandaise on top of corned beef hash and english muffins with a side of hash browns and 2 cups of coffee with sugar and cream. Ugh - I was Ms. Bloatus Fatimus. Luckily I only ate about 1.5 of the benedicts and just about a quarter of the potatoes.
We then went to visit S's grandmother in the rehab facility she is in after injuring her leg. She was doing well. Apparantly we were too close to a really fancy grocery store though and S couldn't resist going there to get some things. So I may have slipped a box of Cheddar Scallion Cheese Sticks into the cart to eat on the ride home. I might have also snuck in a couple of Vermont Maple Honey Caramel chocolates for us as well. S got fixens for a tasty 'last supper' of sorts for us. He isn't doing this cleanse with me, but he is going to a diet of non-processed foods heavy in fruits and veggies, which is what I will be doing after I break fast. We also got a bunch of lemons for my cleanse.
It occurs to me that I ought to take a second to explain what this cleanse is all about. It was developed by Stanley Burroughs about 50 years ago as a way to conquer disease and help people get back to health. It consists of drinking a laxative tea each night, drinking what's called a salt water flush (2 tsp. of sea salt in 32 oz. of H2O to be the same specific gravity as the blood) every morning, and drinking 6-12 servings of lemonade throughout the day. Each serving of lemonade is made up of 2 Tbs. fresh-squeezed lemon juice, 2Tbs. grade B maple syrup, 1/10 tsp. cayenne pepper, and 8 oz. of water. To learn more you can google Master Cleanse or go to http://www.therawfoodsite.com/.
Back to the bad food . . . so we polished off the entire box of cheese sticks! OMG - YUM. S decided to make stir fried ginger steak with smoked gouda mashed potatoes and steamed greens. There was so much yummy food. He used a little over half the block of smoked gouda for the potatoes and we devoured the remaining cheese while he cooked. And then we ate. It was soooooo good. But I felt disgustingly fat afterwards. This cleanse cannot come at a better time.
I spent some time making up my lemonade for tomorrow. I made up a whole batch for work to make my life easier. So that's done. Now to drink my Smooth Move tea, relax with S, and go to bed. More tomorrow!
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