Day Nine (Not Really)

So after much soul searching and debate yesterday I decided to break my fast and stop the cleanse. Too many negative emotions were being dragged up for me to deal with and I had been in a very very bad funk since Friday night. Nothing I tried helped to pull me up out of the funk. I also found out yesterday that the mortgage company where I am temping as a receptionist is moving me to on-call status as of Monday of next week. Basically they are letting me go because business is slower than they thought it would be. But if it gets busy they will call me. They have free lunches on Thursday. So perhaps the smallest reason I stopped this cleanse is because I want to take advantage of a last free lunch. Being let go was definitely the straw that broke the camels back for me concerning the cleanse though.

I don't feel bad about stopping short of the ten day mark, because I made it farther than I did last time and that in and of itself is an accomplishment. I also realized that I have a lot of emotional baggage that I need to work on. I have a lot of demons in my closet that I need to face and get rid of or accept and move on. Being let go will give me the time I need to accomplish that, as well as work on my goals. I will also have a good amount of time for school. I will be able to do my Yoga teacher training sooner rather than later so that I can start teaching sooner. I will also be able to do work study at The Arlington Center so I can take some classes there. I am not upset at being let go, but I was just getting used to the idea of getting paid again. I will definitely be doing cleanses/fasts more often. Most likely juice fasts with bentonite clay. I am going to make sure that I use my free time to best of my abilities. I want to be a good house-frau for S as well as being good to myself and following my dreams. I am very fortunate to have been given this opportunity to do what I actually want to do. I am not going to waste it!

Yesterday I drank the lemonade until I got home and then proceeded to have 4 pieces of celery with some of S's homemade peanut sauce and a piece of my homemade bread. It took me about an hour to eat them and they were so good. After that had started to digest I went to make soup. I surveyed our ingredients and decided that I would make Italian White Bean and Spinach soup mostly because we had spinach and a bunch of fresh basil. Here is a basic recipe. I don't really measure when I cook, so hopefully you can follow along.

Italian White Bean and Spinach Soup

3 Small onions chopped
3 Carrots sliced into disks
3-4 Cloves of garlic minced
4 Stalks of celery sliced
3 Medium - small potatoes diced
8 Cups of broth or water - your choice
1 Can of small white beans - again, your choice, make sure they are rinsed well
1/2 bunch spinach - trimmed
As much fresh basil as you want - minced
2 Scallions - chopped
A bit of dried oregano
Salt and pepper to taste
A bit of Chipoltle or other spicy pepper ( I like Chipoltle because it brings a smokiness to the soup without adding bacon or other pork products)

Saute the onions, carrots, and celery over med-high heat until they begin to sweat and soften. Add the garlic, oregano, and chipoltle and cook until fragrant. Add broth, beans and potatoes and bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce heat and simmer uncovered for 20 -30 minutes. Add spinach, basil, and scallions and simmer until wilted. Salt and pepper to taste. Serve with Parmesan cheese to top, or if you are being healthy, you can use nutritional yeast which is what I do. I love it's cheesy flavour and it's vitamin B benefits. This soup is great with a nice sour dough bread for dipping in the tasty broth.

I had 2 very small bowls probably just enough to equal one whole bowl. It was such amazing soup. I also had about 4 Vinta crackers which are just about my favourite crackers on the whole planet besides Akmak. That is until I start making my own, which I plan to do starting this weekend. My goal is to make everything I can within reason. Crackers, pita bread, regular bread, granola, broth, chips . . . you name it, I want to figure out how to make it myself. It will be much healthier and cheaper. S and I want to get away from all processed food and try to eat as healthy as possible. More fresh fruits and vegetables and whole grains and healthy meats and lots of fish. I am also going to use this journal to keep track of what I eat and the recipes I use.

So far this morning I have had a whole grapefruit, 1/4 cup of angel hair with peanut sauce, and 2 cups (from 1 tea bag) Mayan Cocoa Spice tea with Stevia. Yummy. Yesterday I weighed 134.4, let's see what eating healthy and working out can do to that.

Day One (In Which Veronica is Tired)

WARNING: THERE WILL BE TALK OF A SENSITIVE NATURE IN THIS BLOG SO IF YOU SQUICK EASILY IN THE FACE OF HUMAN BODILY FUNCTIONS READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!


Ok so I really didn't sleep much last night at all. I woke up at 3:30 and that was it. I was up. No real reason why. I wasn't anxious or anything, I was just awake. Tired, but awake. I realized that I needed to plan my Salt Water Flush (SWF) better. I realized that I should have made it the night before in a bottle and brought it into bed with me. I figured I should do it right then, so I got up at 3:30 went to the bathroom (which I think is what woke me up in the first place) and then made the SWF. I crawled back into bed and tried to sleep but that didn't really happen too much.

When S's alarm clock went off at 6:18 (third snooze attempt) I drank my SWF. I tried to doze off after he left for work and managed it a little too well. I finally dragged my carcass out of bed around 7:20. I started the shower and sat on the toilet hoping for an elimination. Had a little one, but not nearly what a SWF should produce. I wasn't that surprised however, as I am sure I am packed with nasty because I have been eating absolute CRAP (no pun intended) for the last couple months as my weight will attest to. I weighed myself this morning before the shower and, ack 138.2 lbs. I have put on nearly 15 pounds since christmas. I am not doing this cleanse to purely lose weight, although I will. I would be happy to be at 130, but we will see where we get to.

I took a shower and packed up my lemonade and walked to work. The work day went by fairly quickly and uneventfully. I drank my lemonade and water like a good girl. Had a few eliminations throughout the day. Tomorrow will bring the ones that go with the SWF I am sure. Who would have ever thought I would be looking forward to having watery BMs??? But that's how you know you are starting to detox!!

S walked part of the way up to meet me on my way home from work and we basically ran teh rest of the way back to the house because it was freezing out and very windy. We snuggled for a bit on the couch and then I had to get ready for M's first yoga lesson. She came over at 6:30 and we went for about an hour. I think she did amazingly well for her first time ever. I think she is going to become a regular student which is exciting, even if I am not certified yet and I am basically just helping out a friend. After yoga was over S came upstairs and we sat and had tea and M got to have some of my yummy homemade bread with Nutella. I had some mint tea which is the only other thing besides laxitive tea, SWF, and the lemonade that is allowed on this cleanse. It was very warming which I needed as i don't get as warm when I am teaching as I do when I am actually doing yoga.

So now M has just left, it's about 8:30 and I have just enough energy left to make up my lemonade for tomorrow, drink my Smooth Move tea, and collapse into bed with S to hopefully get some sleep tonight!!